“What”, you may ask, “is is a coach approach? A coach approach is simply finding a way to use the skills, techniques and knowledge of the life coaching field and apply them to your daily life. The International Coach Federation defines coaching in the following way:
Professional coaches provide an ongoing partnership designed to help clients produce fulfilling results in their personal and professional lives.
As a life coach I work with the premise that my clients are creative, resourceful and whole. This premise profoundly affects my approach, because I’m always looking for ways to bring a client’s creativity, resourcefulness, and wholeness to bear in any situation, so she can play at the top of her game.
As a coach, I also know that coaching is more than a collection of skills, or what I do; it is all about who I am—the person I bring to the coaching relationship. That is why personal development is the “sine qua non” of the coaching profession. As coaches we want to bring our best selves to the client/coach partnership.
So how could you bring the coach approach to your daily life? I suggest that one way you can accomplish this is by changing the quality and tone of your conversations throughout the day with the use of some coaching skills. And by conversations, I mean all the conversations you have with others, as well as those you have with yourself.
Think about the thousands of words you speak every day with others as well as with yourself. For example, at home you may be talking with a friend, asking a child to clear the dishwasher, or sharing a professional problem with your partner. At work, you may be conversing with a team, setting goals, or simply saying, “Good morning!”
Then consider all the conversations with yourself that occur in a day. Awareness of your self-talk might be a little less obvious, but it never ceases. Often these conversations are more critical than your conversations with others. Can you see, if you changed the quality and tone of these conversations, how you might change the climate at work, at home, and in your inner world?
In order to shift the nature of these conversations, I’m going to suggest the metaphor of a “Conversation Box.” Consider it a box that surrounds every conversation you have both with others and with yourself.
Take a look at this box! You will notice the word, INTENTION is written on the lid because every conversation has an intention. For example you might employ conversations to:
say good morning to family members,
say good morning to your employees, colleagues, or boss,
delegate tasks to others,
work with a team on a task,
ask a kid to clear the dishwasher, or
catch up with an old friend.
In next month’s newsletter, I will introduce you to three coaching skills that you can use to enhance your conversation boxes.
Meanwhile, I have a hunch. I’m guessing that even though you add the coaching skills at a later date, the very act of bringing attention to your conversations will improve their tone and quality. I’d love to learn whether or not this proves to be true for you. My curious self would truly appreciate this information,
Happy Labor Day to you and yours!
Bonnie
Every women who travels through the midlife passage needs a little inspiration along the way. When you sign up for the Midlife Discovery newsletter in the box to the right, each month you’ll receive a motivating message from me in your email inbox.
One of the conversations I have with myself is reminding myself of how valuable I am, how much I contribute to the general well-being of my family and to those with whom I associate, how my happy outlook helps others to be happy, too.
Hi Roberta! Thank you for this wise contribution. What useful reminder that a “happy outlook helps others to be happy too.”
Good to hear from you, Bonnie